Then There Was You Read online

  “I’m sure I would’ve.” He knew it just from the way her face softened and eyes danced when she spoke about him.

  Paige gazed up at the sky, watching some leaves dancing on the wind. “I was supposed to be here for three weeks. He adored it here. Was talking about staying permanently. So I came to see the country he’d told me so much about. I didn’t know when I’d have another opportunity.”

  “Why’s that?”

  “I was due to start with the Chicago Symphony that March. Ever since I first picked up a violin when I was five, all I had ever wanted to do was play. When I was seven, my dad took me to my first symphony. And I knew from the moment the curtains opened and the conductor picked up his baton that was my destiny. Ethan saved my life but my arm was a mess. Six surgeries, twenty-seven pins, three years of rehab.” She said it factually. “My insurance gave me access to the best care anyone could ask for. But, at the end of the day, it wasn’t enough. I’ll never be able to play like I could. The specialists say it’s a miracle I’ve gotten back as much function as I have. That I can play at all.”

  He couldn’t even imagine the depth of her loss. He couldn’t imagine his life if he couldn’t play anymore. And he was no symphony contender. Not even close. I’m sorry didn’t even begin to express his feelings. Instead, he wrapped his fingers around hers. “You still have an amazing gift. I’ve lost count of how many people have gotten teary when they’ve heard the Almighty demo.”

  “Really?” Paige looked at him with wide, hope-filled eyes that overwhelmed him with the desire to bury his hands in her hair and lose himself. But he couldn’t. Not when Connor was right. She needed to know.

  “Really.” He pondered what to say next. Unlike him, her dream had been unjustly ripped away from her. Out of the two of them, he was the one who’d deserved to lose everything, yet hadn’t. All he knew was that the girl he’d seen play had more musical talent in her left pinkie than he had in his entire body. “You need to play, Paige. People need to hear you.”

  She was silent for a few seconds, staring ahead. “I will. I just need to work out how it fits with my life.” The breeze lifted her hair, swirling pieces that weren’t captured by the loose braid around her face.

  Tucking them behind her ear, she turned back to him. “Thank you for bringing me here. I know I was rude last night, I’m s—”

  “Shush.” Josh pressed a finger against her lips. “Don’t even think about apologizing. Not for last night. I’m the one who’s sorry.”

  “For what?”

  “For not kissing you.” The words were out of his mouth before they even hit his brain.

  Paige’s eyes widened and her jaw sagged.

  What had he done? He groaned, burying his head in his hands.

  Fingers curled around his bicep. “Josh.”

  “I’m sorry. I know I’ve just ruined everything.” If there was one line he’d never crossed, it was making a move on another guy’s girl.

  “How?”

  “You can tell your boyfriend I’ll be in Chicago on Thursday if he’d like to beat me up in person.”

  The silence festered for a moment before she broke it. “I don’t have a boyfriend.”

  He cast a look over his shoulder. Was she pulling his leg? But no, her gaze was clear and honest with a side of confused.

  “But what about the guy I saw you at the airport with? The one who sends you forests worth of flowers?”

  “Oh.” Her face smoothed out. “Nate’s not my boyfriend. Just a good friend. He’d like to be more, but he’s not. It’s a bit of a long story.”

  “So you’re—” Words suddenly failed him as what she was saying almost spliced his heart in two. “You’re not seeing anyone?”

  She shook her head in slow motion, a glimmer of a smile on her lips. “I am not.”

  He sat back up, lost in the moment. He wanted to kiss her more then he could remember wanting anything. But he was going to do things right this time. And the day he got on a plane to go away for two weeks was not the right time.

  He clasped his hands to stop himself from running his fingers through her hair.

  “Okay then.”

  She tilted her head. “Okay then.”

  “So when I get back, we should talk.” Too late he realized that he had no idea if she was even interested. “I mean, we don’t have to. I’m not assuming you’d . . . It’s just. . . And I need to tell you about . . .” His vocabulary failed him. Another few seconds and he’d be reduced to miming.

  She tilted her head, studied his face. “I’d like that.”

  “You would?”

  “I think so. It’s just. . . I mean. . . You are. . .” Now it seemed to be her turn to flounder for words. She locked eyes with him, the gold that flecked them seeming to stand out even more in the morning light.

  He was completely unable to resist the moment. Lifting his hand, he ran his thumb across her cheek. “Paige—” His phone buzzed in his pocket, the alarm he’d set for when he needed to be heading to the airport for his flight.

  Paige peered at her own watch then gave him a push. “You need to go.”

  “I do.” Every atom in his being resisted, but he stood, and she rose beside him.

  “I’m going to stay for a bit longer. My flight isn’t for another few hours.”

  “You’re sure?”

  She nodded. “I’d like to spend some more time here.”

  “I’ll be back on the twenty-sixth.”

  “I know.”

  He wanted to promise to call, to write. But the truth was, between the brutal schedule and the time difference, he didn’t know if that would be a promise he’d be able to keep.

  She poked him in the chest. “Go. I’ll never be allowed to help with a tour again if you miss your plane because of me.”

  Before he’d even had time to think about it, he’d looped his arm around her waist and tugged her close.

  She gazed up from under long lashes and one hand settled on the arm that held her while the other fell on his waist.

  He had to go. Now. If he didn’t, there was a strong possibility he might not leave. At all.

  His breath caught as he tumbled into her warm brown eyes. From the past, he could hear her saying that his life was her worst nightmare but he shoved the memory away.

  A palm on his chest gave him a slight push. “Seriously, you need to go.”

  She was right. If this was meant to be, distance would only confirm it. And if it wasn’t, well, he needed to leave before he did anything he might regret. He unhooked his arm and stepped back. “You’ll be okay to get a cab back to the hotel?”

  She held up her phone. “Google. It’s a wonderful thing.”

  “Okay, then.” Josh stepped back, but his feet were slow to turn him away. “I’ll see you in two weeks.”

  She smiled, pointed toward the exit. “Go!”

  He was walking toward the exit, feet like they were walking on air when he remembered. He hadn’t told her about Narelle or Hannah. Hadn’t even breathed a word about the truth that might ruin anything they could have before it had even started.

  Thirty

  Well, this had been one of the most unexpected mornings of her life. Paige settled back into her seat and turned toward the window, attempting to hide the grin she couldn’t hold back.

  Kellie settled into the seat beside Paige. Nearby, the eight other band members returning to Australia also found their seats for the final leg of this trip.

  She glanced at her watch. Josh would be in transit in Auckland right now, about to board his flight to Los Angeles. Talk about bad timing.

  When Josh had groaned about ruining everything, she’d been certain he was about to blurt out that he had pledged himself to a life of celibacy. Or was one of those guys who didn’t even hold hands until he got married.

  He was sorry he hadn’t kissed her. She rolled the words around in her mind, then closed her eyes and relived the tender look on his face as he’d said it. He’d looked at
her like nothing else mattered, but with a hint of surprise on his face, as if he hadn’t been expecting the words to come out of his mouth. But he hadn’t tried to pretend he hadn’t said them.

  She allowed herself to embrace the truth: she liked Josh Tyler. She liked Josh Tyler. A lot. Her internal thermostat kicked up a notch as her mind turned to her chemistry with Josh and she fanned herself with her magazine.

  “You okay?” Kellie asked the question from the seat over, a welcome distraction to Paige’s chain of ill-advised thought.

  “Fine. Why?” Beyond fine. Deliriously happy over the guy Kellie also had her heart set on. Her stomach twisted at the thought. Kellie was a nice girl who’d been nothing but good to her.

  Outside the plane, the engines started up, the steady hum filling the cabin. The knots in Paige’s stomach multiplied and she sucked in a deep breath. She’d made it through three flights in the last ten days. She could manage one more.

  “You’ve been quiet today.” Kellie rotated so she was facing her full-on. “Where did you disappear to this morning?”

  Paige hesitated for a second. She’d had enough of pretending. “I went to visit the memorial garden. My brother died in the 2011 earthquake.” She waited for the familiar feeling of guilt to lock her chest but it was absent. For the first time in six years.

  Kellie’s eyes widened. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.”

  “It’s okay. You couldn’t have known. It’s not something I talk about often.”

  A bump and the plane pushed back from the gate. Paige rolled the paper bag in her hand between her fingers.

  “Was Josh with you?” Kellie asked the question quietly.

  Paige turned in her seat. Fear filled Kellie’s eyes. She didn’t want to hurt her but she couldn’t lie. “He was.”

  Kellie leaked out a breath and blinked quickly a few times. “Are the two of you together?”

  “No.” Something like relief started to cross Kellie’s face and Paige knew it wasn’t fair to leave it there. “Not yet. But we sort of talked about it.”

  “Okay. Thanks for telling me.” Kellie’s fingers twisted in her lap.

  “I’m sorry.” There was no point pretending she didn’t know how Kellie felt about him. It was written across her every move and word every time she was near him.

  Kellie shook her head. “Don’t be sorry. I’m the one who should have done something ages ago. It was just that after everything with Hannah. . .”

  Hannah. The name etched across his shoulder blade. Janine’s comments about Josh being paranoid when it came to women. Sarah alluding to him not dating in years. It all made sense. He’d had his heart broken. Badly.

  “It’s been a long time.” The engines kicked up a notch and the plane started trundling toward the runway. Paige gripped her paper bag in her fist.

  “You’re right. It has. I guess I had just hoped. . .” Kellie trailed off and ran a hand through her hair. “Well, he must trust you to tell you about his daughter. And he deserves all the happiness he can find. If that’s you, then I’m glad for you both.”

  Paige opened her mouth, tried to respond, but no words could get past the boulder that had suddenly lodged in her chest. His daughter?

  Thirty-One

  The September air blew a refreshing breeze as Paige closed her car door. She still couldn’t wrap her head around September being spring. Though, going by her mother’s detailed narrative the night before on Skype, she figured it was preferable to the ongoing heat wave in Chicago.

  She pulled open the door to The Coffee Club, and stepped inside to the sound of conversations and the grind of the coffee machine. Where was Kat? She unwrapped her scarf, and slung it across the top of her purse while scanning the room for her cousin.

  Even though she’d been back from New Zealand for a couple days, she hadn’t seen her cousin yet. They’d conversed via text messages and Post-it Notes stuck to the coffeemaker. Which wasn’t a great medium to describe how she’d turned into an emotional yo-yo. One second giddy that Josh had feelings for her, the next in a state of disbelief that he had a daughter. Was he divorced? Widowed? What had Kellie meant when she said ‘after everything that had happened’?

  She needed her cousin’s perspective. Otherwise she was going to go crazy waiting for him to come home. Meanwhile, she needed coffee. She joined the line that snaked past a counter crammed with luscious-looking baked goods, and scanned the coffee menu.

  “Just realized I forgot my purse, so hope you’re buying.”

  Paige caught a glimpse of her cousin’s bright top out of the corner of her eye before the rest of her came into view.

  She turned to face Kat as the back of her shoe snagged on something, pinning her in place.

  Twisting down, she got a glimpse of a black dress shoe planted squarely on the heel of her flat. “Excuse me.” She tugged her shoe loose, then glanced over her shoulder for her apology.

  Nothing. The suit was so engrossed in his smartphone, he didn’t even look up. Jerk.

  She turned back to her cousin. “So what can I get you?”

  “Regular skinny flat white please. I would say thanks, but it’s the least you can do since you’re earning such big bucks at Harvest and all.” Kat tossed her a teasing wink. The girl charged more for one day of her makeup skills than Paige made in a week.

  “That’s me. Big dollars central. Just like everyone else working there.” The truth was she had about twenty bucks to her name. Thank goodness tomorrow was payday.

  “Any chance you can get me an invite to the next yacht party?”

  After a morning staring at spreadsheets until her eyes crossed as she tried to make the Grace budget work, it felt good to joke. “Sure. The new one is due to arrive any day now. Janine is so excited. This one has a customized spa suite.”

  They reached the counter as the conversation passed from the comedic to the ridiculous. Janine was renowned for hating spas, as she found enforced relaxation stressful. Crazy woman.

  Placing their coffee orders, Paige also parted with some of her last remaining dollars for a gooey chocolate macaroon.

  “That way.” Kat pointed toward a comfy-looking couch that had just been vacated.

  Settling back, Paige relaxed her shoulders into the soft leather.

  “So who is it?” Her cousin was studying her over the rim of her cup.

  “I’m sorry. What?”

  “Is it Rich?” Green eyes beamed into hers. “Hmmm. He recently broke up with Helene. But then again, they didn’t date long and his heart didn’t really seem in it toward the end.”

  “Not Rich.” Not that the bass player wasn’t a nice guy, but no.

  “Hmmm. Geoff? Bit more of the strong silent type . . .”

  They would be here all afternoon if Kat went through every single guy in the crew. It was a big group.

  “It’s Josh.” Paige tried to pick up her mocha, but her hand shook so much it sloshed over the sides into her saucer, forcing her to put it back down.

  She hadn’t heard from him since they’d parted in Christchurch. Of course, she of all people knew how crazy his schedule was, but that hadn’t stopped her from over-analyzing the lack of contact.

  Kat’s brow wrinkled. “Is that the new drummer?”

  Paige opened her mouth but then her cousin grinned.

  “I’m kidding, obviously. A blind man could have seen that one coming.” Her cousin settled back into the corner of the couch and studied her. “Why do you look like you’re in mourning? You like Josh. He’s a great guy. This is not a bad thing.”

  “I just. It just. He’s . . .” Paige groaned. “Josh Tyler. How can I have fallen for Josh Tyler? I don’t even like Josh Tyler.”

  “You know it’s weird calling him by his full name like that, right?”

  “I know. But Kat . . .” She waved her hands in the air. “It’s Josh Tyler.”

  Kat pursed her lips for a second. “I know who he is, Paige. And I’m pretty sure he puts his pants on one leg at a
time, just like the rest of us.”

  Bad, bad illustration. Just the thought of Josh putting his pants on sent a tsunami of heat shooting up her face.

  “I know. But I can’t ignore what he is.” Paige picked up the macaroon and took a bite, its chocolate center oozing onto her fingertips.

  Kat shifted forward. “Of course you can’t. But the most important thing is who he is, not what. Josh has plenty of people who are all about the what. Plenty of girls who are all about the image and the fame and perceived glamor. What he needs is someone who is all about the who. And not giving him a chance because of all that other stuff? That’s as bad as all those girls who are after him because of it.”

  Her cousin was right. As always.

  “So here’s my question to you. Do you like Josh Tyler the guy? Not the musician. Not the profile. Not the son of Greg and Janine. The guy.”

  Considering how much Paige missed talking to him after only three days, not to mention the way her toes curled as she remembered the smoldering look he’d given her in the garden, she couldn’t deny it. “Yes.” She picked up her drink again and took a cautious sip.

  “And he likes you?”

  “Yes. Well, I’m pretty sure.”

  “Then start from there. Assuming you’re at least open to working the rest of it out.”

  Easy for Kat to say. She wasn’t the one whose stomach curdled just at the thought of everything that Josh Tyler came with. If only it were as simple as Kat thought. But Josh wasn’t an ordinary guy. And her gut told her that trying to pretend he was would put her on the fast track to heartbreak.

  But Kat was right about one thing: Paige’s issues with megachurches and his family and profile weren’t his. They were all hers. She needed to either deal with them or walk away now because from being with him on tour she knew one thing: he was born for it. And whoever ended up with him needed to be one hundred percent onboard with that.

  She pulled in a breath. “I feel completely unequipped to be part of his life. And my visa expires in seven months. But it’s not that. Kat . . .” She looked around them to make sure no one was close enough to overhear their conversation. “Josh has a daughter.”